I am disapointed in myself for not writing more often. This year, 2011, has started out a bit more rough than I expected. At the beginning of the month an old friend called me and asked to watch her son full time this semester (she's a teacher). I am very grateful for the opportunity but it has added more to my plate and made it harder to find my cozy place to spend with God. Also, there was a baby girl we had a chance of fost-adopting and my hopes were up...but we found out yesterday that she is going to a distant relative. Another thing that happened is my husband lost his job last friday. We've known for a little while that there was a chance of this happening but when it does it still hurts and is a shock. If my husband doesn't find a new job in the next 2 weeks we are going to have to move and make some dramatic changes. This puts a lot of pressure on him and worry on me.
Last night I hit my breaking point and the tears finally began to fall. I decided to just go to bed and read my bible until I fell asleep. I prayed and just really poured out my heart to God...it was good. I always feel so much better after I just give it all to Him, I don't know why I don't do it more often. God's peace comforts like no other. I figured I needed some words of advice so I turned to Proverbs. I found myself glued onto one particular verse in no time at all. Proverbs 23:18 says, "There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off." I felt like God was saying, "Jamie don't give up. There is still hope. No, I didn't answer your prayers in YOUR timing, but I am God and I hear you and you can have hope that everything is going to be okay."
Wikipedia says, "Hope is the belief in a positive outcome related to events and circumstances in one's life." I can have hope today because of how God has shown His care in past events of my life. My husband and I have had a pretty rough first 6 years of marriage, not really within our marriage, but in the circumstances of our life. We've been through much harder times than this and God has seen us through, sometimes miraculously and sometimes practically. But our hope in Him has never faltered. He is good and He will see us through this as well.